Manners matter

A woman in England was put on blast by her future daughter-in-law for sending her a letter addressing the concerns she had with her behavior toward her son, their family, and decorum in general.  Instead of taking the letter in stride the young lady in question decided to display the letter on the Internet where it has gone viral.  Her actions only further emphasize the points that the mother-in-law was making by sending the letter in the first place giving credence to her claim that the future daughter-in-law is classless, lacks basic manners, and common sense.   Not only did her plan to piss off her mother-in-law and exact revenge fail, she has now put her own family on blast, driven a wedge between herself and her future in-laws, and made her husband choose between her or his family.  This is exactly the kind of childish, selfish behavior that she accused her of displaying.   Behavior like this is not isolated to this one woman either.  Her behavior is an echo of the barrage of egocentric, overindulgent, self-centered women who make men lament their commitment to them and are helping to destroy the institution of marriage.

Marriage is already in dire straights and on the chopping block in western society.  Well, at least the idea of a monogamous marriage is. Women wonder why men “dine and ditch” in the relationship department, this is part of the reason why.  It is the sense of entitlement you feel.  The idea that life is supposed to provide for you the way fairy tales foretold of prince charming rescuing you from the doldrums to have a princess caliber life.  But that is not how life works.  And believing this fallacy, you have grown up without the skills required to sustain a mutually aggregated relationship, where both partners are required to pay due diligence to the union.

The truth of the matter is that the majority of you are broken.  You have watched too many episodes of Sex in the City and Keeping up with the Kardashians.  You believe life is going to be easy and handed to you on a silver tray.  We can not all be Mr. Big.  And let’s face it, if we were, we wouldn’t date you anyway.  That show was a joke, because Big would have never gone for that anteater-faced Carrie.  He would have had a different young piece of ass in every city he went to.  Men like that don’t want a partner, they want someone to adorn their arms.  And when you have passed your prime of eye candy status, which is usually around age 25-26, you are no longer needed.  You are expendable.  Do you really think you are all going to marry a billionaire who is going to sweep you off your feet and solve all of your problems?   Really, do ya?  Hmmm.   First off, there aren’t that many billionaires in the world to begin with.  Second, the ones that are mega wealthy and powerful are Mr. Big in name only.  Third, and most importantly there are a lot more beautiful women than you in the world.  Not just that, but more interesting women, more driven women, just more women period.  So the question becomes, what do you have to offer me?

What is going to set you apart and make us want to buy the cow and not just get the milk for free is that you need to possess some other redeeming qualities.  You need to learn again to be a lady.  Learn to cook, learn to sew.  It does not make you inferior or subservient to wash some dishes, vacuum the house, do some laundry, or wash your own car.   If you are part of a loving, carrying relationship you should both take turns taking care of each others’ basic needs and the needs of your property.  We would all love to have servants, butlers, maids and valets, but it’s not in the cards for all of us.  And if you really desire them that badly, have children, they’re nature’s reluctant servants.  Basic, simple, common sense manners is all that is required.  Know who you are, what you have, and what you are capable of fiscally, and it will make so many of your problems go away.  Whether you live in a trailer park or in a mansion, if you show respect to people, they will in turn show you respect.

What this woman did was not unreasonable.  She did what she thought was appropriate for her son.  She was not trying to alienate the girl.  She tried to approach her in a private adult level putting them on equal footing.  She laid out examples of her behavior that was undesirable, and explained how she could rectify it.  As their benefactor for their wedding, it is my belief that the mother-in-law can say, do, act anyway she’d like.  And if the future daughter-in-law doesn’t like it, don’t accept the money.

About thedailyheard

Just a guy with an opinion and some time on my hands trying to find out where the sidewalk really does end.

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